And when I say Ill divorce you, its the last thing I want to do. I know you must be wondering why Im writing this letter. Your email address will not be published. We used to be so close, and I miss that. And when you view me like that all the time, it hurts me so much. The family we were when we couldnt stand being apart because something was always drawing us closer. Ever. This is a very poignant letter written by a wife to a husband, who is insecure, suspicious and has serious trust issues. Writing a letter to a husband could help you choose your words carefully and convincingly. My life wouldnt be the same without you in it and I dont even want to imagine it. Youre making me feel like youre ready to leave and Im not ready to let you go. Be a good listener: Be willing to listen to your wifes thoughts and feelings without judgment. You know it as well as I do: We just cant go on like this. Many of my patients who suffer from depression claim they're . What more could I do to help this? In as much as there should be fun, one should note that marriage goes beyond having fun. But the truth is, Im not happy either, and that makes me feel like Im failing you as a wifeand as a person. . It should be brief, concise, and straight to the point. I'm not happy. Shouldnt we keep trying to make each other happy? Thats not how you count eternity and I need to know that I can count on you on an eternity with you. You did this without even giving me an explanation as to why you felt this way and what exactly made you think that ending our marriage would be best for both of us? I know its hard to understand why I crave it, I cant explain it myself. Marriage comes with a lot of responsibilities and obligations. You get me and I get you. A Letter To My Husband About Feeling Unwanted And Unloved - Think aloud An Open Letter to Shitty Husbands . You dont know what its like to be in your shoes, so I am going to tell you everything. Im lonely and depressed and I dont know what to do. If theres anything at all that could help improve our relationship and make our lives better, please let me know! I didnt sign up for this. Still I feel compelled to tell you that I understand. We had everything we could have ever wanted as far as material things go, but most importantly, we had love and happiness between us. You work long hours at work, and when you do come home, all you do is complain about how tired you are. I should acknowledge I don't know the details. Squeeze my hand tight ifyoureawake too. Dont ever stop making me feel wanted because theres a long road ahead of us. I know that weve been having problems lately, but I want us to get through them together! But I want you to know that I am here for you, and that when things get tough, I'll be there in spirit. Even our fights are so passionate that at times when we have differences I choose to fight than remain silent. Forgetting the bread will not be the real reason. There isnt anyone else Id want to spend this life with. Its that I feel like Im losing control over my mind. Is the weather nice? I hope I did a good job of supporting you and loving you through it. An open letter to the woman in the unhappy marriage Please always keep an eye on me, but know no matter how many times you tell me Im worth it I probably wont believe it on cloudy days but please never stop telling me. Privacy All you need is to put your mind to what is it that you want to tell your husband, and since is about you are the best person to write it and write it how you want it to be understood. You are no longer the same man who used to love me and care about me like no other man in this world does. I am not an affectionate person and he knew that from day 1 but Ive made a conscious effort to be better and I make it priority because I dont want him feeling the pain I do caused by him. Categories A letter to someone who hurt you, Read This If You Have Difficulty Getting Over An Almost Relationship. Today I am your husband. Not only is Swords & Snoodles a parenting website, it also often features mental health issues and experiences with children who have additional needs. Im feeling like my husband hates me and if thats so, I dont want to stop you from walking away. I know my depression can seem selfish. I realize you don't know me. Just be sure to choose your words right and you are good to go. That man used to smile every time hed see me, but now he doesnt smile anymore. You're going through a lot right now, and it's hard for me not to feel helpless. Example Letter To Spouse To Save Marriage (Use This!) - Medium Hoping you will cross the bridge and come over soon. There are many ways by which a husband can deal with his wife without having to leave the marriage. It is also known as major depressive disorder or clinical depression. Well, a woman who doesnt feel desirable in her husbands life anymore. I never want to be the source of your unhappiness. Writing a letter to your husband about how depressed you are and how you feel can feel weird especially if it is your first time and the fact that it has to come in a letter form. Youre still here, but its like youre not or dont want to be. I know that this letter may seem harsh and mean-spirited towards you but it is not intended that way at all! I dont want you to feel miserable because of me. Additionally, Ritual Meditations offers a supportive community of like-minded individuals seeking to find inner peace and a deeper connection with themselves. Most of the time I wont. I used to be so happy when we were first married but now everything has changed and it feels like we are just roommates living under the same roof instead of husband and wife who should love each other unconditionally no matter what happens! She co-founded Poetry Paradigm and is an executive body member of Indian Performance and Poetry Library. When we first met, I was a foolish college boy with a tremendous crush. "@type": "Question", I need to be confident that youre never going to give up on us. Depression is very clever, you see it builds up a wall of anger piece by piece, and you never notice it until its so big it begins to topple over. She has a passion for writing and often refers to it as her therapy. { You don't even seem to like being close to me anymore. I dont have to clear every misunderstanding that you might harbour. What changed and why did it have to change? Thank you for that. Im glad youre home. And I need help. When we first met, I thought you were different. I left my surname for you. The multiple days where you would stay in bed, or not shower, or the days where eating a meal seemed like too much work. Sometimes, when you look at me, it feels like you dont even see me. I dont know if youve noticed, but Ive been feeling really down lately. I know things have been really hard for us lately, and Ive been thinking about how to make things better for us. Becci is very honest, brutally honest, and prides herself on this. Because despite the internal battle you fight on a daily basis, you still manage to be truly the best wife I could have ever hoped for. Your email address will not be published. Because were not love-struck teens anymore. Click here to learn more. } I'm not sure how I should be feeling about the things said between me and my husband. Be there for me like you used to be, or dont be with me at all. I didnt show. "@type": "Answer", Join Our Facebook Group For the Latest Topic Discussions , PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT: If this post was helpful or if you have anything you want us to write on. Marital tension has been related to an increase in the prevalence of mental health issues such as depression and alcoholism. I know that no one can take away all the happiness from your life except yourself but please stop blaming me for everything that goes wrong between us because I dont want any more fights or arguments between us anymore! Without it, Im not even a wife Im just a person who makes sure all the housework is done. I know that we have had a rough patch lately, but I want us to move past it together. I miss the bond we used to have, and I hope that you miss it enough to try to create it again. 4. I was at a party and I had a tiny crush on the married birthday girl, and I watched her husband ignore her all night (and already knew him to be a less-than-ideal partner). We even talked about divorce, for Petes sake! "@type": "Answer", One of the things I care a lot about is humans. Related Reading: When I discovered the dark secret my girlfriend shared with her BFF. I know its important to know when to give up, but this letter is about me begging you to keep fighting. In one sweeping statement, you managed to communicate exactly how much you value me and at the same time how much value you have placed on yourself. It can either be drug addiction or behavior-wise addiction. Ive gotten help since then, but I still fall short sometimes. 12 Signs Of A Lying Spouse. She was speaking to me in a male voice. Marital tension has been related to an increase in the prevalence of mental health issues such as depression and alcoholism. I need them to be a part of the family we used to be before we even considered having kids. As we stood on stage in front of all of those strangers, acting our hearts out, I never once believed we would find ourselves here. This letter is like catharsisfor her. I need your love and for you to show me the affection you used to. Please forgive me. I want to imagine us holding hands and going apple picking like we did when we were dating. It provides users with a range of resources, including guided meditations, mindfulness exercises, and practical tips to help them improve their mental and emotional well-being. Most of all, I miss you. I hope you know I try. This is a letter from a wife to a husband where I talk about years of hurt and pain you have given me. Why are you so insecure of my love for you? We share subjects that impact your daily life and we primarily discuss and write about all things related to relationships, breakups, mental health, astrology and much more. Her. I dont see that spark in your eye when you look at me. My entire world would collapse. "@type": "Question", "We have been married five years, but have no children, only a handsome home. The life we had before was amazing; we were happy together, but now it feels like everything has changed overnight. Have difficulty sleeping or sleep too much. I know that you would do anything for me. This article was originally published on Jan. 8, 2020. Home Depressed Unhappy Wife Letter To Husband. An Open Letter to My Spouse Struggling with Depression. Its not and you know it. Im going to sit down and write mine today. I dont know why, but I think its because of you and our relationship. The distance between us started to widen and our love language changed We barely even talk and I feel neglected and hopeless. The inevitable distance between two people in love, the restless neediness of love. I love you so much and I just want to make you happy. If you dont want me anymore, so be it, but know that Ill love you forever just like I promised on our wedding day. Stress from a toxic relationship can cause a number of symptoms, such as sleep difficulties, appetite changes, and reduced immunity. Why is it that every action of mine viewed as being something more than what it is? I have been a faithful wife to you for the past ten years, and I have tried to be a good mother to our children. The only reason Im still alive is because I couldnt do that to you. I hope that you could still feel that way about me too. Outline your objectives and intentions. 4. So long as we can do it together. Even if you dont want me anymore, I want you to want me. Thank you for understanding when I cant put a meal on the table and getting us takeout. "mainEntity": [ I know how much you love me and how much you want me to be happy. It will hurt like hell to watch you leave, but I dont ever want to force you to give me the love I deserve. So before you feel insecure, think of all that I have done for you. Instead of leaving the marriage, why dont you find ways of dealing and coping with your depressed wife? Writing a letter in itself can be stressful as you challenge yourself on how the introduction should look and how the body should be. Kate is a mother of three living in Co Wicklow. She is also the joint-convenor of the National Poetry Festival. Think Aloud is a destination where youll find stories about every step you, as a woman, take. I wanted you to trust me because I knew I wasnt wrong. { I am writing this letter to you because I need to tell you how I feel. We celebrate the happy, imperfect love without judgment or bias, and strive to help people love more mindfully by viewing their relationship patterns from the lens of mental health and psychology. We never go out anymore either because we can never agree on what time or place might be good to go out at. I feel the cloud approaching and it petrifies me. 4. Life has thrown us some major obstacles but we always get thru them and come out Better people. Sometimes thefatigueis so bad I just want to cry. "@context": "https://schema.org", That way you are fulfilling your duty as a husband who helps a depressed wife. I have given you all that I could give, but it just seems like it is never enough for you. Please dont ask me if ImOK my automatic answer will beyes. After all, youre all that I have, and all that truly matters to me. Depression clouds my mind and fills me with horrid thoughts about howunlovable and worthless I am. Like women with depression, men with depression may: Feel sad, hopeless or empty. Most importantly, I need you to be by my side. Depression and unhappiness can stem from a variety of causes, including: It is important to note that each individuals experience with depression and unhappiness is unique, and a combination of factors may be at play. Dont give up on our marriage. I just wish we could be better partners too. Dont ever stop being the man I love and let me remind you of the woman you once adored. Or were our vows just a joke to you? Our chemistry is crazy. How Do You Tell Your Partner You're Depressed. I know it can add up quickly. I know it still scares you. I feel like Im drowning in a sea of my own tears. I am sorry that I couldnt keep my promise of being your wife who will always be there for you. Your voice used to be music to my ears and now I rarely even get to hear it. That there was nothing I could do to be a better husband or companion and help your sadness and anxiety go away and that, yes, you were crying, but it was nothing I had done. Write a letter to anyone you wish had a better understanding of your experience with disability, disease or mental illness. I wish that we could escape from this world together and find another place where we can truly be ourselves without judgment or criticism from anyone else around us!Also See: Letter To Selfish Husband. "@type": "Question", If youd like to participate, please send a blog post tocommunity@themighty.com. Youre not happy with me anymore either because I havent lost any weight since having the baby and you say that I dont look good in anything anymore so why bother trying? We have now been together five years and married for nearly two of them. But Im not guilty of adultery. Heres my letter: Please understand I do love you, as i write this i feel relief and sadness. Marital tension has been related to an increase in the prevalence of mental health issues such as depression and alcoholism." Be a supportive husband. But its just like the sun, always existing even if not always seen. Sometimes Ill tell you. Depression clouds your mind. I love you, and Ill never stop loving you, but it needs to go both ways. Now, we dont even fall asleep together and I feel so alone in that bed we bought together. The symptoms of depression and unhappiness can vary widely, but may include: If you or your wife are experiencing any of these symptoms, it is important to seek professional help. I know that things arent always easy between us like they used to be when we first got married years ago because of how busy both of us have been lately with work. I dont feel like you want that future anymore. When we first met, I thought that our love was going to last forever. This article would guide you as to how to write a letter to your husband as a, Life stressors such as financial difficulties, job loss, or the death of a loved one, Relationship issues such as communication problems or infidelity, Biological factors such as hormonal imbalances or genetics, Persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness, Loss of interest in activities that were once enjoyed, Difficulty concentrating or making decisions. We both had our dreams and aspirations when we got married but somehow with time, things have changed for the worse in our marriage. Marriage is considered a beautiful thing especially when both couples understand each other and are sure of what they are going into. I love you so much, but sometimes it feels like we are living separate lives. Thank you for funding my therapy, doctors appointments, and medications. I know sometimes I overreact about the smallest things and get angry, but please be patient with me. When we married, we promised each other that we would be there for each other no matter what happened, but lately you have been absent more often than not. I hope youre doing well. The whole scene made me sad because it reminded me of how I used to treat my ex-wife. But we've been married for more than ten years, and nothing has changed between us. But as long as were both willing to work on our relationship, it can work. Stress from a toxic relationship can cause a number of symptoms, such as sleep difficulties, appetite changes, and reduced immunity. 8 Sample Letters to Your Husband For Difficult Times - Live Bold and Bloom Writing about your feelings can be beneficial in helping you understand your emotions and may help you discover other ways to express yourself to those you love. All those pieces coming together the texts, the absences on an affair. As long as we had each other, there could be no obstacle too large. I want to publicly thank you for loving me and supporting me. If you or someone you know needs help, see oursuicide prevention resources. I wanted so badly for things to work out between us, but it hasnt happened yet. Were two people who promised eternity to each other, and weve been together for years. And thats why Im going to write a letter to my husband about feeling unwanted and unloved. Anew day often scares me. Were not girlfriend and boyfriend anymore, we are husband and a wife. } Sign up for Scary Mommy's daily newsletter for more stories from the trenches. Im sorry that I am not the wife you deserve but I dont know what else to do. You can also request feedback in the conclusion. Did you ever once think about it? And you had thought it was a boy! When I share those dark thoughts with you, it saddens you to know I hurt. One brave woman recently reached out to her husband with an open letter to open up about what she called a "killer" illness.